Yesterday, a friend gave me $300 and said, "Take your daughter shopping. Spend all of it. And only buy things you WANT, nothing you need." She watched my other kids while I took my 9-year-old on a mother-daughter date.
We ran to Target and went on the funnest shopping spree EVER. Because when do I have instructions to buy only what I want and nothing that I need? Never.
When do you do or buy something only because you WANT it, and not because you NEED it?
As moms, we can so easily get stuck in the cycle of "everyone-else-comes-first."
You know what I'm talking about, right?
✅You're the last to eat breakfast (or lunch, or dinner).
✅Whatever money is in the budget goes to the kids' clothing, or school supplies, or linen, or ... anything but a manicure for you, or flowers just because, or a new necklace just because you feel like it.
✅The outings that get done are for the kids, or for errands … but not the gym for you.
✅You're on the way to the park (or wherever), and you grab snacks for the kids … and bring nothing for yourself (and then of course you're starving, so you're shoving down the pretzels and the fruit cups).
I could write endless examples, because as moms, we are GIVERS. And NURTURERS. We radiate love and care for our families and our friends and everyone around us.
BUT—we are not martyrs. And putting ourselves last just backfires.
We end up getting resentful and overtired and snappy, and take it out on our partners or our kids. Or both. Or on ourselves.
I can't even begin to tell you how utterly different, but totally amazing, it was to have INSTRUCTIONS to buy only what I want and nothing I need. (I'm thinking this should be an annual ritual or something ... 😂😂😂)
If the thought of doing this sends shivers down your spine, and your brain is saying things like "NO WAY. That is so indulgent. I would never do that. I CAN'T do that. I can't afford to THINK like that. I HAVE to come last," then this message is ESPECIALLY for you:
Think about how you would want your grown child to show up to their life, and show up for yourself that way.